Friday, December 16, 2005
ADOLESCENTS
I'm coming to think that our job as parents when dealing with adolescents is to remain calm. If we allow ourselves to become upset and our feelings to be hurt then we risk causing a grudge that may last for a long time. This is coming from a parent that does get her feelings hurt. Whenever I am told that I'm not being fair I think of all my efforts to be fair and think it was all for naught. In my better parenting moments I can take a deep breath and know that it will all blow over in a day or two. Their bodies are starting to go through so many changes and their minds as well. Its hard for them to be this age. Its hard when you want to cry at the slightest problem. My job becomes easier when I remind myself of these things. I'm also trying to teach them that they need to buckle down and ride out this difficult change and realize that some times they will have these unhappy feelings and that's just the way life is. I'm hoping that my "better parenting moments" will end up counteracting my not so great ones and that we'll all come out at the other end without any serious wounds!
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3 comments:
I think you're right in this--and I might expand it to say that it's not just for the parents of adolescents, but the parents of other high-strung kids too. I think you are doing a great, thoughtful job, and your kids will realize it someday, too. But probably not until they have kids of their own!
landismom, I realize this too but I'm not sure how successful I was at remaining calm when they were smaller...
Since some kids are not appreciative at all, I consider myself lucky that my kids do appreciate me, just not when we are in a battle.
You're right angry prophet the best thing is to back off, but it takes a lot of teeth gritting!
Mom I love you! I ever mean to give you a hard time, but I can't help it.
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