Its hard to believe that I didn't post once in August. I was home a lot but decided to just take it easy, knowing that the start of school was coming. Sometimes I wonder why it seems so tough for me to have the kids start school. After all, its them that have to go off and spend their day working. I get a lot of quiet time at home....at least until they come home and my work begins. The first day of school I spent two hours reading through papers and filling out forms. Then there is the self imposed worrying. Do they like their teachers, will they be able to keep up their grades, will their extracurricular activities overwhelm them. Then there are the aggravations. Why does that teacher decide to take points off of the students grades just for being absent (even when they have a legitimate excuse)? Why do we need to show a photo id and sign our kids out when the people handing them over to us know us? Why does the cross country coach make everyone do extra laps when one girl is the only one who walks during practice? So as you can see I have plenty to keep my mind occupied. And who's worrying about me possibly going insane?
For some reason having my first kid going into high school has been a difficult transition. Not for him. He seems absolutely fine. Its me. Its sort of like turning 40. Its the sadness of letting go. For me it's the worry that I'm not letting go enough. I don't want to let him go but the alternative is being over protective. Or over involved. For me its a difficult balancing act. I have never been a mother who is over joyed at the start of school. Never have I said "hooray, my kids are off to school and now I have alone time". I've always been very content to be with my kids. I'm just hoping as time marches on, this does not become a problem for me or him. Part of me wonders how this could ever become a problem but then I see the example of the other families. Once the kids get to be teenagers they seem to become so distance. The parents back off as the kids develop an obvious annoyance with their parents. This is touted as normal. If that's normal, then what are we? Abnormal? Ha ha, only I could worry about something like this!
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Yes, the worrying is most intense for me in the beginning of September. It's wonderful having a tiny school, but it also means no ability to change teachers if my daughter doesn't get along with the one assigned to her grade level.
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